Monday, August 8, 2011

Who are we?


Over the weekend I was searching for long lost contacts. For people I shared incidents in my life with 15-16 years ago, the people with whom I grew up. But regardless of the extensive social networks, I was unable to locate many of them.

Well, the fault isn't completely on those addictive time-consumers because it really is very hard to remember the full names from that age! And add to that the extensive collection of Indian names with their multitude of possible combinations along with minor variations like the addition of an “h”, removal of an “a” or sometimes a completely different spelling they would have assumed for use on these social media and you have a huge list to dig through. Ask me, I know how it feels to have spelt your name in a particular way your whole school life only to find it spelt in an entirely different way on the certificate finally!! And, of course even if I get a name right, identification based on their facial features would be a near impossibility as I have practically no clue what they would have changed into now. And let’s not forget the distractions posed by the empty pangs of hope that “that particular profile pic could be my friend or I wish it is. Maybe I should drop a message and find out. If not the old one, a new friend made!”.

The final outcome here is that I didn’t make any new friends today nor did I find the old ones. But it made me wonder about the people who were around us and the people who may or may not be around us in the future. In effect it made me think about how we are and what we are.

I know I know...I sound like I just turned 70 ;-)

The fact is that who we are is basically a culmination of all the incidents in our life - both big and small - over a period of time. The incidents can be as big as loosing a parent or as small as choosing where to sit in a crowded place. The same incidents can have completely different effects on different people. How that incident impacts a person depends on how that person assimilates it or may be on the events that might have happened before this incident. Somehow, at a particular point, the past adds up to help read the present and thus define the future.

As I type this, I wonder how big these changes in a person could be as compared to them 15-16 years ago!! May be a change that impacts who we are, how we think or how we react in the present days as compared to so many years ago might require more hard work to understand and to break open the base that was created such a long time ago!

Every person is right and wrong depending on the way he/she reacts to a particular incident. What is it that defines how a person is supposed to be? Would we ever want to change who we are?? Would you be OK with a person who tries to change you from what you already are to someone he/she wants you to be??

1 comment:

Anjali said...

Many a times ..I have asked this myself and when I look back there have been times when I was never who really i'm but the situation made me someone else and then I start questioning myself ..I'm definately not who I was 10 or just maybe 3 years back and I will not be what I am today 2 years or 10 years down the lane..People change and it becomes more difficult to search for the person one knew even if u have known them all your life so on the contrary to search and know a person whom u knew years back is like knowing a new person all together...